Tuesday, October 9, 2012

31 Days of Life: Day 9 (by Brandon)

I know you would much rather be reading Kristen's thoughts on anything than whatever thing I might say, but today it is my turn.  This probably won't be interesting or grammatically correct, but here goes.

Today was Christmas. Also known as the day the UPS man silently glares "I hate you" as he drops off 20+ boxes at church.  I heard the truck pull up and started to rush outside to greet the driver, but refrained so as to not look completely ridiculous.  (I had already tracked all the package and knew what was coming.)  

As soon as I had "signed" the slip I began ripping into boxes.  Unlike Christmas Day, I did not have to take turns with children wanting their own presents...these were all for me.  

First off, 3200 glow necklaces for Light up the Night (It's a Halloween thing where we tell people about Jesus, you should try it).  Can't really play with them, so I move on to the good stuff.

First a little back-story:  This year I am loosely in charge of our church's Christmas production.  Therefore I am forced to think about Christmas and listen to Christmas music before Thanksgiving (which I am pretty sure is forbidden in the Old Testament somewhere).  I love Christmas, but don't like it overlapping the cooking Superbowl (especially the dressing, not stuffing; stuffing is evil).  Anyway, back to today.

I had before me 11 boxes filled with happiness also known as very large yard inflatables.  The first one was my 7 ft tall Christmas tree.  Does it look like the picture online?  Only one way to find out.  I plugged it in right in my office.  Yep looks like the picture, but looks bigger in here.

Next, what is Christmas without Jesus, so I find the box labeled "nativity," plug it in and up springs a massive Nativity.  This is awesome.  Next I have a little snow family hanging out in my office.  

What's Next?  OOHH the 12 ft tall snowman.  When he is 3/4 full, I realize my ceiling is not 12 ft high.  Did you know that a half full 12 ft tall snowman is not exactly easy to drag through a church?  Get him on stage in the sanctuary and let him finish inflating.  Do you know how wobbly a 12 ft tall inflatable snowman is when fully inflated?  I do a short happy dance in my mind and think about dragging all 11 inflatables in here to blow them all up.

Remember I have enchiladas for lunch (inflatables can wait).  Realize I am eating lunch at 1:30.

A few thoughts:  How many inflatables are too many on stage?  How many snow machines do we need?  Can I wear yellow tights in front of hundreds of people?  Do they make inflatable snowmen larger than 12 ft tall?  Will anyone notice that there are no wisemen at this year's production?  Why does everyone include wisemen in their nativity sets? I hope someone brings me tamales at Christmas. How did I live the past 30+ years without tamales at Christmas? And Green Chile Cheeseburgers?  I have been so deprived.  Where am I gonna put all this stuff for the next 2 months? 

I have all the fun.

The End (sorry.....you can't have back the last 2 minutes of your life)

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